When You’re Older, You’ll Understand

When that belt hits your bottom,

Know that’s what they were told love was

Their trauma bleeds through their soul,

Habitually passed down

I’m sorry you have to bear it now

Please don’t question if they love you

Abuse is their love language

They don’t know any better

They weren’t allowed to use their words,

To express their honest feelings

So now you’ll end up doing the same

When she mentions being stupid,

It wasn’t meant to be your name

Don’t worry you’ll turn out mostly fine

Their mistakes will bring you lessons

Lying is a life skill you’ll use often

You’ll play pretend everywhere you go

And have heroes outside of households

When his hand is around your throat,

Know he means you no harm

He’ll do the same to your mom,

And that image will burn into your mind

You’ll grow up swearing off relationships

They’ll never apologize

It’s not their job to fix you

They were never given the tools

When they raise their voice and yell,

Know you’ll bring it to your own family

They’ll make you finish every dinner,

And make you envy kids that don’t

When you cuss and swear like them

You’ll swallow pepper and soap

You’ll never forget what you were told,

Should you turn out to be gay

But you can tell them anything

They can always kiss your bruises later

When you’re finally on your own,

Know they’ll miss you dearly

They’ll wonder why you never call,

And why it’s small talk when you do

They’ll wonder why you don’t share,

Like they gave their childhood to you,

Even though you never asked

You’ll still love them I promise,

But you’ll question everything they did,

And hesitate to have kids of your own

I know you’re a child yourself

Remember they’re still young as well,

Mirroring the adults that failed them too

I hope you understand their intentions

They didn’t think their love could scar

They’ll see themselves in you,

Struggling to break the cycle

Please forgive them for me too